Is Mah Blog

Is just a blog. Whatever happens to spew from my mind at the time will wind up on this blog in one way or another.

Well, I think is sounds dirty. But it really isn't. I'll esplain.

Last year was when it started. My Italian class had gone to the computer lab at school to...study Italian stuff, and I caught some of the stupid folks in my class playing, of all things, Mario. I was beshocked. Some people tried to ask them how they were doing it, but they wouldn't tell us. So I set to work. I happened to notice that the program they were using was called FCEUltra (they're start bar. Pf. Yeah, I know. Maaajor deduction skills here), so I did a search on that and found the very same program. And it had more than just Mario (Final Fantasy 1 and 2!!! Squeeehappy!)

Well, a year later, I remembered that program existed, and was playing it a couple of days ago, when it occured to me to copy it and stick it on my cruizer. But I didn't know where the file was located. So I found it, and made a copy to bring home. Then I talked to Keen about it, and he said it was called an 'emulator'. (I LUV YOU MIKE!!!). And he esplained them to me.

Well, this was like, the best news I'd ever heard, so I went and downloaded a SNES emulator, and souped it up with some of my favorite games (called ROMs. ^^). It's freaking awesome. I'm hooked all over again to Super Mario World. Heehee.

And that, as they say, is that.

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I really...really have nothing to talk about that I probably haven't said a bloody million times before. But I'm bored, and tired, and depressed, and feeling like complaining about something, so bear with me.

I started my new semester last Thursday, which means new classes. So far, they're all pretty great. Even having two math classes isn't as bad as my Chemistry class. I can't say I really hate any of my classes yet. Even Algebra is tolerable. Bizarre, right?

The conceit of the school's seniors, however, is kind of getting on my nerves. They try to force onto us the notion that everything they do is worth merit. But, I suppose, they are graduating this year. They've pretty much earned the right, I guess. And I'll probably be like that next year, so I guess I won't say too much about that. That, and I really don't feel like it.

I'm getting really tired all the time. And I'm always kind of feeling down. And I'm feeling kind of lonely, too. It sucks, and there's no 'kind of' about that.

We had a really stupid assembly on Friday. Our superintendant is trying to force the idea that engineering is the best career to have in the whole wide world onto us. We had this all-engineering schools college fair, and he made us write a one-to-two paragraph essay on what we thought about it and stuff. Well, I wrote an essay he won't soon forget. And it was more than two paragraphs. Unfortunately for him, it took two and a half pages to get across what I wanted to say. I don't freaking care. It made me mad. If I remember, I'll post it in my writing. I kept a copy of it, because I really liked it. It turned out to be kind of funny. Hell, maybe the superintendant will have a sense of humor, and commemorate me on it or something. Or he could be a big freaking stiff like the rest of the staff and try to have me expelled or something. Once again, I don't really care.

I haven't been really drawing a lot, or writing a lot. It isn't so much a lack of time, more of a lack of inspiration, or even a lack of will. Even my roleplaying's kind of going down the drain. I've been writing like a cheesy fanfiction writer, and it's kind of bringing me down even more. I've been trying to read more (which usually boosts my creativity) but that hasn't been working too hot, either. It bites.

God, I feel really weird. Have you ever felt lonely, and just wanted to have someone to be there for you, but at the same time you just wanted the world to leave you the hell alone? Hm. Maybe it's just because the people I'm usually surrounded by...I can't be too serious with them. I can't bitch or whine as much as I'd like to, because they don't want to hear it. And I don't blame them - they have their own problems. Ones way worse than mine. But that just makes me more depressed, because I feel like such an ass for being all hung up on myself when everyone around me's suffering, or something. I feel like a bad friend, a bad writer, just a bad everything.

And to make things worse, I'm stuck here in the library until my mom remembers that I'm here, and comes to pick me up. Which will probably be in another hour. Or two. I think I'm gonna go crazy. I just wanna go to bed.

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 I have a chem final tomorrow. Then Thursday I'll start a new semester and have all new classes and never have to worry about Chemistry again. I shouldn't even be talking to you right now. I'm supposed to be studying! I'm only a few points away from passing and - and I gotta go! @_@ BYE! *runs off screaming and ripping her hair out*

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Life is, in fact, very weird. What brought me to this conclusion? Well, if you've been reading, you'll know that I haven't exactly been having the best...forever. =P Quite the contrary. Well, since my last entry this is some of the stuff that's happened to me.

Christmas break rolled around, which was excellent news. But then, on the 23rd (I remember the date because I had just come back from Christmas shopping) I got sick, had a fever, and have pretty much been feeling lousy ever since. That bites the big one. I hate being sick.

Not only that, but I was instructed by my English teacher to read the first ten chapters of The Catcher in the Rye over the break. I'd read it two years ago, so all I did was consult the CliffsNotes to refresh my memory. I haven't actually read a page of it. We're on chapter 19 now. Nya ha.

Christmas was okay. I got some art stuff, a 2-gig flash drive, and a copy of "Amadeus". I love that movie.

Let's see...we came back to school on Thursday, January 3rd (which was kind of dumb), and nothing really happened until I got to my government class. There, my teacher decided that, since we only had two days that week, he was going to talk to us about goal setting. And he gave us this really inspiring (and almost tear-jerking) lecture about how influential your attitude is and stuff. He really put some emphasis on that, if you have a better outlook on life, things will start to have a better turn out for you. He looked at me the first time he said it. I wonder about my teacher sometimes. He's the kind of guy who seems like he knows more than he lets on. Even if you've never told him anything.

Anyway, on my way home, I decided to treat myself pretty nicely. I smiled more and did all sorts of stuff, save for taking a walk (it was FREEEZING outside, or I would have. I was tempted to anyway.). Then Friday, things started getting weird.

It all started when I woke up. My alarm went off, and I got up...and I felt pretty good. My nose wasn't clogged, I could breathe alright, and I felt pretty well-rested. Heck, I had even dreamed. All of that stuff was strange - usually I don't dream, and wake up feeling crappy. It was a good weird, though.

Anyways, I threw on some clothes and had something to eat (since I had so much spare time. Usually I don't eat - I'm never up for eating in the morning anyway. My stomach is like, the last part of me that wakes up. xD), and then I went to school. I paid little attention to my weird morning - I was too tired to really notice, anyway.

But then, in Chemistry, the strangeness of my day began to present itself. We were going to do two labs in Chemistry that day, and I wasn't looking forward to working with Zach again. But I paid really close attention to the instructions, so we'd at least have a leg to stand on when the lab began, and then...it happened. A girl in my class, Shayna, is really close with Zach, and she's lab partners with a friend of mine, Rachel. Shayna turned around and asked if she wanted to trade partners with me. It was as if God and all his little angels exploded all over the place. I was shocked, and euporic and exstatic and OMFG. Naturally, I said yes. I didn't hesitate, or think twice. Zach looked heart-broken. Oh well. Serves him right.

So now I'm lab partners with Rachel. Which is AWESOME. She later told me that she lucked out, too. Apparently, Shayna's just as bad as Zach. That's fine. They can fail together. I have a productive, smart lab partner now. Nya ha. We even got through the first lab okay, too. And get this - we were going to have to do a write-up for it (which I volunteered to do. But can you blame me?) but my teacher actually changed his mind and said we didn't have to. All we had to do was a little data table and a neat set of calculations to show that we knew what we were doing. And it didn't even have to be typed! Well, I did that, and turned it in.

The second lab wasn't quite as easy, but Rachel consented to doing the paperwork for that one. Bless her.

It freaked me out how good my day was, but what really blew me away was that it stayed good. Remember that painting I was freaking out about in my last entry? I finished it. Mathematically speaking, I wasn't supposed to finish for another...well, I wasn't going to finish by the end of the semester, anyway. But I did. And now I have an entire week to do what everybody else is doing. I missed a project, but I was excused from it because my art teacher really liked how my painting was turning out. I don't like it that much, personally, but it's a great concept. Oh well. Take what you can, I guess.

THEN, once again, the angels exploded all over my life, because I got the news that my English teacher was absent. I really think that was the clincher. I was officially convinced that something was going horribly wrong. xD I began to wonder if I was dreaming, or if I had died or something. But it's real. It was all really real. We wound up having a substitute, a really cool one, and we took the quiz we were supposed to take (which was unbelievably easy) and watched a movie with all the spare time we had left. It was awesome.

Nothing particularly awesome happened after that, but surely you can understand just how freaked out I was. Friday was a great day. I couldn't believe it. I still can't believe it. It was great. I hope it keeps up. Maybe my Government teacher's on to something...

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