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Sometimes it's only at the end of the world that you can properly reflect on how it began... Sora, Riku: After Everything.
Fandom: Kingdom Hearts II/
Warnings: fluff, introspection, guilt, mild swearing, boys kissing and touching each other, cumshot/
Written in Third Person Limited, in the present and past tenses. Riku's POV/
The landscape remains bathed in perpetual night, here at the end of the road… black waves licking at their shoes, the strange empty wind ruffling their hair, neither warm nor cold. The moon never moves from its low slung position, just above the horizon and no tidal forces pull at the dark ocean.
Riku listens intently to the quiet breathing of the boy to his left, his steady heartbeat attempting to assert the existence of time, even here… They had fallen into silent introspection and remained that way for… how long?
‘How long have we been here?’
Riku can’t tell… He’s lost count of Sora’s breaths… the beats of that noble heart… the one he’d always envied the strength of… He can admit that now…
Back at the beginning he had wanted to call it righteous anger, needed so much to brand Sora the betrayer… but in the end he had finally acknowledged that it had always been jealousy… that his heart was the traitorous one.
The brunette looks resolute, seated in the dark shifting granules, skinny legs bent and even skinnier arms curled about them, his chin resting on one upraised knee. His eyes glisten softly in the unnatural moonlight and Riku wonders if he’s thinking about the past… If he is, he’s probably only recalling the happy times… so like him.
The silver haired boy almost chuckles.
Sora’s eyes, blue on warmth, and always watching him… They had filled an already bold child with the urge to be better … be noticed… be important… be someone to him… and a young Riku had reasoned that beating Sora at everything was certainly one way to make sure he never looked away for long… The challenge between them was always so much more about fun and friendship to the younger boy. In their battles and contests, Sora lost in good nature and his warm gaze was always so alight with humor even as his ears were filled with the older boy’s gloating. Even as Sora sputtered in indignation at being ridiculed, Riku knew he needn’t worry of pushing too far... perhaps he should have…
They are alone now, in all the worlds… the doors have all closed and all chances have been expended. All the farewells they never said would have to remain unspoken. Riku sighs and hears the rasp of cloth to his left. Shifting in the black sand, Sora moves closer, silently working his hand into the older boy’s… folding their fingers together without making eye contact. He falls back into the sand then and Riku follows him down, settling next to him, their hands still clasped together. They allow their eyes to drift closed, their thoughts to travel back… to the island.
The scene of so many battles… echoing with so many shouts and taunts and laughs, and the clacking of wooden blade against wooden blade, the crunch of sand under small bare feet.
Even when Sora won, it was with self deprecating claims of “luck”. If it had been anyone but Sora it would have sounded smarmy… annoying… It was still annoying… but only because he was so very sincere. In a way, Sora’s modest ways had only fed Riku’s desire to dominate the boy, to swell within his azure gaze until he eclipsed all else to Sora.
But Riku could not blame his friend anymore… he had no one to blame but himself…
The hand in his is squeezing now, and a soft sound from the boy next to him pulls aqua eyes open, a pitiless blank sky replacing the warm tropical blue of his memories, the scent of ozone stinging his nostrils and burying the sense memory of flowers and salt… of life. It cannot hide the scent of tears though and Riku rolls his head to the side, observing a glistening droplet descend over the gentle curve of Sora’s cheek, leaving a slick trail.
‘I looked everywhere for you…’
But Riku had hidden from him… in so many dark places… Hidden from himself in darker ones still.
When he shifts to his side, and up onto one elbow, their fingers slide apart and Sora’s eyes flutter open, spilling another salty drop and before Riku can even think, his lips are pressed to the boy’s warm cheek, trapping the moisture, tasting sea and skin and following the saline trail with his mouth to the melody of Sora’s quickened heartbeat and low, nonverbal intonation… pulling back slowly to see what those eyes held for him now... more than fearing to know…
It had been easier to name it ‘disapproval’… for to call it ‘hurt’ was dangerous… but seeing him with new friends… looking to them for support… listening to their advice… fighting alongside them… Them… and not him… It had hurt… Only much later on was be able to honestly admit why.
It had been so much easier to make it about her….
He should have apologized to them…for having used her like that. It hadn’t been fair to either of them. At the time though, it had seemed so clear… And he again damned Maleficent to nothingness for her trickery… and thrice damned himself for being so easily fooled. He had been so stupid… so arrogant… he had all but invited the darkness in …and that Bastard along with it… Ansem… Xehanort… whoever he had been…
And he had been so wrong about Sora… about his strength… his determination… and for all that Riku had sacrificed to see his friend again, he had to admit that he’d learned about self sacrifice from the small brunette’s example.
Sora doesn’t bully or guilt, he doesn’t cajole or manipulate. Sora simply lives and fights and believes and makes mistakes and draws all who have eyes for the truth along with him towards the light, shining like the Dawn that Riku was always striving towards...
Sora…Kairi… and King Mickey… They had only ever seen the light in him…
The boy is so close suddenly, sapphire eyes blooming with unshed tears like dew on Forget me Nots… It makes Riku’s chest ache to look at them, makes his stomach hurt to think about those eyes darkened with confusion and pain... He’d hurt Sora… belittled him and disregarded his strength but those eyes had always forgiven him… always greeted him with warmth even as Riku flung his barbs.
Those eyes are looking at Riku now with concern after a choked noise of pain escapes his trembling lips. His side is panging again and his leg’s gone numb, never a good sign. Sora is rummaging in one of his pouch pockets, coming up with a cracked and leaky potion bottle, still about two thirds full and offering its contents.
‘Takes the edge off, Gods yes…’ Riku can’t help but groan in relief as the pain abates and a pleasant tingle suffuses through his tired body.
“Nngh… Yeah… Thanks Sora… I owe you…”
Sora’s eyes are literally shining with happiness as he just shakes his spiky head, grinning widely.
Oh Hearts, those eyes… How many times had they been his beacon in the Dark after he and Sora had closed the door against the encroaching darkness, trapping King Mickey and Riku along with it? He’d shouted at Sora to take care of Kairi, still unable to simply say “I’ll miss you…. …I love you…” …but alone in the endless- timeless- featureless- blackness he had spent a lot of ‘time’ thinking about Sora… thinking about what had changed… and what hadn’t.. Time didn’t pass… he didn’t get tired, or hungry… sleep was a non-issue. Standing felt the same as sitting, as lying down and thus, walking was an exercise of will against futility. And in the firm grip of sensory deprivation like nothing else, Riku had found himself immersed in some very revelatory fantasies…
‘Something so natural…’
It still colors his cheeks to recall the vivid images his imagination had conjured in that desolate place, especially with Sora inches from him. It just isn’t fair… that he’s still afraid… even after all this time and everything that had happened…
Even though Riku knows that Sora dearly loves him… the only thing he’s ever feared is still there in his heart…
“I’m sorry… Sora…”
For what…? The kiss? …The years of repressed longing? …For letting the darkness take him? …For everything…? Is it yet time to forgive himself? He’d also learned about forgiveness from Sora after all…
After his defeat at the hands of Roxas, Riku had seen no other choice but to embrace a darkness beyond anything his blindfold could offer him… Oh it had hurt… but his will was strong and his darkness had bent to it. He had returned and he had won… he had completed his mission so that DiZ could start lining the pieces up… for Namine… and he had accepted the price, willingly…
Namine had twice offered to take the memories away… of the Dark… of the torture and violation Xehanort’s Heartless had inflicted on his mind while possessing his body… how he’d watched from behind burning orange eyes, helpless as Sora had willingly sacrificed his own heart for Kairi, never even giving himself a second thought… Memories of how he’d been manipulated by the Organization to nearly betray Sora all over again in the stark halls and rooms of Castle Oblivion... She had wanted to take it all back... to make it all better. It was all she had ever wanted… a Nobody from a Heart devoid of Darkness? How could she be anything but a creature of pure empathy? No anger or hate or jealousy to draw strength from even the memory of… more a figment than any of them… Even Sora’s heart had possessed darkness enough to make Roxas… whose anger and fury had scarred Riku like nothing before or since… and he was thankful..
Riku had both times declined her offer.. He didn’t want to forget… it was crucial that he remember what had gone before… besides… the second time.. his body… no… he couldn’t have accepted it…
Riku had not let himself fantasize about Sora while in that cursed bastard’s form… couldn’t allow himself to envision those strange hands caressing Sora’s perfect skin… those balefire orange eyes and that cruel smile reflected back at him in Sora’s wide blue gaze. No… it had been best to put the thought of even allowing the boy to ever see him again out of his mind… He needed only to save Sora… He convinced himself that it was all he wanted, that the thought of never looking into the clear eyes of his friend again didn’t tear his heart to shreds…
“You know… I never gave up back then Riku… I never believed… you were really my enemy… and after we closed the door… I never ever stopped looking for you.” Downcast blue eyes turn upwards again, tracing pale features and searching an aquamarine gaze that is softer than in the past. “There are things… I’ve forgotten... but I know I never stopped wanting to find you.”
“I know Sora… I was watching… Remember?” Riku fell silent again just examining the sweet face of his best friend in all the worlds.
“You changed me, you know…” Fingers still tingling from where they had held the boy’s smaller hand, thread between brown spiky locks, cradling his soft rounded cheek.
“You changed yourself Riku…” Another tear slips down his face, following the shallow valley by his small nose and wicking into the crease between his lips. Riku follows it with his gaze.
Why is he whispering? It’s so quiet anyway…
“Kiss me again then… here.”
Sora is whispering too, touching his tear moist lips with one finger and Riku does as he’s asked, gently covering Sora’s mouth with his own, their lips sliding together, softly parting to accommodate each other.
Nothing had ever been sweeter.
All Riku had ever sought now seemed so pale by comparison, and Sora is nudging his lips apart, burying his still gloved hands into shining silver locks and he’s tilting his head and opening his sweet mouth, tiny pink tongue swiping Riku’s lower lip, as he’s sucking it in… dipping inside eagerly as Riku’s mouth goes slack in vague shock. “Sora?” He only just breathes the name but the brunette responds instantly, squeezing his eyes closed and gripping the back of Riku’s head, crushing their mouths together and it’s all Riku can do to react quickly enough…. to keep up with Sora’s fevered oral exploration. ‘Gods, Sora…’
When did he become so bold?
‘Where the hell had he learned to kiss like that!?’
Riku had spent a lot of time in The World that Never Was while Sora slept in that pod, spying on the Nobodies who resided there. Sora would never remember the events at Castle Oblivion but Riku did and once he learned of the Organization’s true goal and found out exactly who their final member was, he began to keep a very close eye on them all… On Axel, the only survivor of Oblivion and thus the only one who would recognize him… but especially on Roxas…
His achingly familiar features but wholly different personality had been so disconcerting… Small wonder he’d lost his first battle with the diminutive hooded nobody.
Axel had been Roxas’ constant companion… in every way Riku had come to realize he wanted to be Sora’s…. Even without hearts they were more content than he… without true bodies they were more comfortable in their own skins… and above all they were free from all the emotional hang ups he wished to shed.. How unfair it had seemed and it was with perhaps, more vengeance than anything that he’d so sought to take Roxas away… Sora… had needed to be whole… and Axel...? Well Axel was a heartless…. A Nobody… He didn’t even really exist right?
Riku still didn’t feel right about the resolution… but what else could they have done?
‘I am sorry Roxas…. Axel…’
They’ve both moved up onto their knees by the time they finally part, each just barely pulling far enough away to pant heavily against the other’s swollen lips, eyes still closed and hearts hammering. With foreheads still resting together they remain for long moments, simply touching, noses and lips brushing together as they continue to kiss lightly.
Riku can clearly feel Sora through his baggy shorts, pressing into his hip where they straddle each other’s thighs in the sand… can feel his strong pulse down there, and he’s every bit as hard… and he knows Sora can feel him too…
“We’ll be the Darkness…”
Riku can’t suppress a shiver as he hears the brunette echo his earlier assertion before the smaller boy is pressing him back into the soft sand and he groans as they settle, Sora’s hardness grinding into his hip… Sora’s firm thigh solidly between his and pressed inward and up, rocking against him just right, like he’d done this before… but he always did catch on so quickly…
And Riku is on his back at the End of the Worlds, with battle calloused fingers pushing up his shirt and it’s only making him harder, thinking that in all his fantasies, Sora had never been the aggressor… but it was so damned good like this. The worn leather palms of Sora’s gloves sliding up his stomach, Sora’s mouth on his again, sharing his breath and swallowing his noises of longing, Sora’s dick grinding against him, right alongside his own, hard for him, because of him… because of him… finally… ‘Oh Hearts… Oh please… Sora… Sora…’
Riku’s old self would have openly mocked him for the desperation choking his voice now…
Sora’s lips are moving against his collar bone, fluttering eyelashes caressing the skin just over his hammering pulse point. Riku’s shirt is unzipped and pushed open almost roughly, and his mostly healed injury twinges, making him hiss and arch, the slight pain blending almost too well with spikes of pleasure. Sora murmurs an apology as he descends to explore the newly knitted flesh and fresh pink skin with lips and gentle fingers.
“Is… this ok Riku?”
It’s soft and sweet and so full of want, and Oh Gods… his belt is being undone and it’s all Riku can do to actually gasp out an affirmative and not simply moan when Sora trails his fingertips down his chest and stomach, hot little mouth closing around a tightened nipple.
And then Sora’s pushing a hand into his pants, reverently stroking him… exploring his shape and length and girth and Riku doesn’t even try to hold back his groan of pleasure… Sora deserved to hear it…
Riku is only dimly aware of his own hands, working open Sora’s belt and fly while the younger boy continues to tease his flesh lightly, with unfocused eyes and a light blush of modesty painting his cheeks, his lower lip caught between white teeth. However, if he’s really embarrassed, it does little to hold him back.
Then they’re bared just enough to touch and Sora’s back against him, jacket shed and shirt pushed up to his armpits… and he’s taking Riku’s hand in his and wrapping it about them both, holding them tight together as their hips tuck inward, rocking toward the center where their bodies meet, hot between their mated hands.
And Riku can now admit another thing… that his imagination had absolutely nothing on the real thing, because Sora is so hot there, atop him… skin so smooth, panting and moaning into his mouth when Riku pulls him back down to claim his lips again, needing to take a just a little control, which the smaller boy willingly allows him…
And they’re rutting against each other in the empty moonlight, hands becoming slick as their pleasure increases and Riku wants to watch Sora’s face the whole time… never wants to forget his rapt expression, eyes half closed and mouth slack in pleasured awe… but his eyes keep slipping closed, his head rolling back in the sand as his body arches up with every thrust, gently pressed back into the sand by the slight mass above him, building momentum…
Riku loses Sora’s lips as the boy buries his face against his pale neck, body shuddering with strain as they work their hands and hips in concert, the little shocks of pleasure coming faster and faster until it’s just a heady blur of sensory information, nearly painful until it snaps…
“Oh-oh.. nghh… Riku! RIKU!!”
And then he’s coming and Sora’s coming, still flexing their hips shallowly as they pulse out over each other, panting into each other’s ears… and it seems so odd to Riku now, that in his boundless imagination he didn’t ever once see it happening this way…
As he’s slowly uncurling his now messy hand from his best friend’s, feeling their combined semen cooling between their pressed abdomens, hips still canted closely together and bodies twitching with pleasing orgasmic tremors, Riku thinks maybe he’s more glad for that than for anything else.
‘I guess I can still be surprised…’
Maybe The Other Side would not be so dark after all.
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