I died?

Aug 9, 2010, 3:27:38 PM | 0 Comments | 2 min read


I had the weirdest dream. It's been haunting me ever since. It's not a nightmare, it's not even extremely symbolic. There was just sensations, or lack of. I dreamed that I was dead. Death in the form of an intense wall of pure blinding light. I died in the light. But I felt no pain, I felt nothing. I was and I wasn't. I felt...nothing. But I felt it. One moment, I was alive. Standing at the foot of a green mountain, the forest was the greenest green and the sky grey, low with heavy rain clouds. Over the trees I could see silver mist fairies languorously dancing to a song only they could hear. I was standing there just being and then, coming down the mountain, was a wall, more like an avalanche of tumbling light. It was immense, encompassing everything, swallowing, transforming all into light. It hit me like a caress even though it had the semblance of a powerful shock wave. Never once was I afraid. It was caresses all around me, a warmth like blankets just off the dryer I took a deep breath I could feel the warm smoke infiltrating my entire being. It was soothing. Then I ceased to be. I knew that I died right there. I was dead. I was no more. I was the light I think. I wasn't alive but I was. It's hard to put it into words. If death feels like that then there's no reasons to be afraid of it. Somehow, I have the feeling it wasn't just a dream. My heart has a mind of its own, twice I had heart surgeries. Did it actually stopped as I was sleeping, dreaming? Did I die for a short moment? I guess I'll never know. But the dream is still with me and it feels like a memory.

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