Little Things: Oneshot

Sasuke rubbed at his eyes while ambling towards the bathroom. Hs hair sticking up in the back and his boxers hung half off his hips. He tugged at them, grunting from the effort of pulling them back up.

Adjusting his balls, Sasuke resumed his haphazard movements and flicked on the light switch. Yawning, his eyes darted around the bathroom before his hand reached behind him scratched his right ass cheek. He leaned to side and cracked his back while looking in the mirror, ignoring the bags under his eyes from a week of putting in twelve hour days at work and grabbed the cup on his sink for a drink of water, immediately spitting it back out, wrinkling his nose at the taste of morning breath in his mouth. It smelled like some dirty old bum's ass.

Sasuke opened his medicine cabinet to grab his mouthwash, stopping when he spotted the bright orange and yellow toothbrush next to his in the toothbrush holder. Only one person would choose that gaudy of a color. And he didn't remember Naruto leaving it there when he spent the night a few days ago. The blinding orange rubber padding and neon yellow stripes would have stood out like a sore thumb.

His hand swatted the medicine cabinet door shut; Naruto was probably lurking around somewhere in the apartment.

Sasuke looked behind him and slowly leaned his upper body far as he could go, his eyebrow raised, his mouth drown downwards, thoughts deep in concentration, looking out the bathroom door, watching, listening for sounds that Naruto had spent the night. Nothing. Not a peep, therefore no Naruto.

Sasuke frowned, perplexed by the silence in the apartment and tossed the orange toothbrush back on the sink before taking a swig of mouthwash. Brushing his teeth before breakfast seemed pointless, but he needed something to get rid of the dead animal stench that permeated his mouth.

He washed his mouth out and headed towards the living room, smelling the aroma of Columbian brew halfway down the hallway, puzzled because he knew he didn't set the auto brew last night. While pulling the covers over his body, the memory of not wanting to get back up to do it came to mind. Still, he wouldn't complain about having something ready to wake him up so he felt human again.

Sure enough, a fresh pot of coffee waited for him in the kitchen. He quietly walked across the living, the soft carpet tickling his toes and snatched a mug from the dish drainer. Sasuke grabbed a mug from the cupboard and poured a cup of coffee, sipping it while walking over to the couch. Setting the coffee down, he sat down, picked up the remote, and turned on the TV.

The boob tube as Naruto would say. Sasuke smiled, flipping through the channels, wondering what was on at five thirty in the morning that didn't consist of kids wearing baseball hats, backpacks—with odd animal familiars or dragons—battling with Beys or cards. Or something equally stupid. None of the names any of those shows had stuck, but he remembered well the multiple times he had threatened to choke Naruto if he had to watch that ugly yellow ratty looking thing say pika, pika one more time when they roomed together in college.

His phone vibrated, probably a text message from Itachi wanting him to call back, and glanced at it, noticing the date. His birthday was today, and he didn't want to think about whatever idiotic surprise Naruto would come up with. He could only hope a surprise party didn't show up at his apartment like last year. Whatever would happen, he knew it would be retarded and likely to make him homicidal and freak out. Then everyone would look at him like [i]he[/i] was the asshole instead of Naruto, who forced him into acting sociable. He knew his friends meant well but all he wanted to do on his birthday was spend time, alone, at home, not going out or having a horde of people invade his privacy.

Sasuke picked up his coffee with his left hand while his fingers absentmindedly tapped against its ceramic surface. His brother could wait on the call; he'd see Itachi at work anyway. Sasuke propped his feet up on the ottoman, finally settling on the Morning Show, not really paying attention to it, his mind going back to when Naruto had a chance to leave a toothbrush in his apartment and why. When Naruto stayed over, he never left anything behind.

Not that it mattered; he'd just drop it off at Sakura's after work. And maybe call Naruto later to remind him to take his things with him next time he crashed there.

~*~

His brother sat behind a large mahogany desk, flipping through a file when Sasuke entered the room. He had managed to sneak away from Suigetsu telling him about a party last night to drop off his report. A break was needed anyway because Sasuke knew if he had to watch Suigetsu's arms flail while exaggerating the size of Kisame's dick one more time, he would have lunged for the idiot's throat.

It took a moment for Sasuke's eyes to adjust because Itachi always kept the lights dimmed in his office, and he didn't understand how Itachi could stand reading in such poor lighting. Their line of work required hours of going through reports and reviewing productivity files with their clients that were sent through by employees, all the statistical crap that he hated.

And that only started the day. After lunch, he and Itachi normally spent their time going through mergers and possible new clients. Not to mention that by the end of the day, one or both of them would spend an hour or two making sure the company's finances were balanced.

A well-lit office suited Sasuke better so his eyes didn't burn by the end of the day. Itachi, though, always preferred the darker areas, which made Sasuke wonder about his vision. It wasn't something he had ever thought about asking Itachi, though, or how to even bring something like that up in conversation. His family, they never discussed unpleasant things, ever, and while he and Itachi were able to touch on some unpleasant things in life, it often skirted around important issues.

Sasuke sighed, slowly making his way over to Itachi's desk. He could easily admit his job bored him most days, and his coworkers drove him up the wall, but the idea of working for someone other than his brother, other than the business their father built from nothing, offended Sasuke. He believed in coming to work and giving a hundred percent even on the days he wanted to commit mass murder throughout the building.

“Hey, I have that report that you wanted done.” Sasuke handed a manila envelope to Itachi. He had spent all week typing the report up, and while he couldn't say he felt entirely satisfied with it, he knew if he didn't hand it in soon, Itachi would be on his ass about it.

Itachi tilted his head upwards and looked Sasuke over, setting the envelope down on his desk. “Sasuke, what are you doing here? I gave you today off from work. You could have turned this in to me on Monday.”

“Now is as good a time as any.” Sasuke shuffled a few stray papers on Itachi's desk into a neat pile. He never understood how Itachi kept things straight since there always seemed to be papers scattered all over the desk. “And besides, I decided I didn't want the day off,” not bothering to mention that he didn't get the text until sitting down in his office.

“Sasuke,” Itachi sighed, his fingers tracing along the natural wood lines in his desk, “it's your birthday today, and you've been working for a month straight, taking work home with you on the weekends. Go home and relax.”

“I don't want to go home and relax. I'd rather stay here and work.” Sasuke pulled out the black leather chair in front of Itachi's desk before deciding just to lean against it, knowing they were probably headed for an argument.

“I'm not asking you to go home.” Itachi set down the papers in his hand. “It's not an option, Sasuke.”

“You wouldn't,” Sasuke's fingers dug deep into the leather. He hated it when Itachi did this to him. “I'm not a child. I can decide for myself whether I need the day off.”

“Go home, enjoy a three-day weekend, maybe go get laid.” Itachi lightly tapped his fingers against the desk before looking Sasuke over. “You certainly need it.”

“Itachi, dammit, quit trying to get rid of me for the day.” Sasuke clenched his fists, trying to keep calm. Itachi could frustrate him so much sometimes. He wasn't some little kid who needed told to go outside and play.

Neither did he need his older brother butting into his sex life. He could decide for himself whether or not he needed to “get laid” without the help of anyone else.

“I'm not trying to get rid of you, just helping you.” Itachi looked at Sasuke, his fingers tapping off the desk. “You come to work pissy, snap at anyone who's in your path, and it's starting to affect your performance. Take a break, relax a little, we'll be fine without you for the weekend.”

“But,” Sasuke pushed the chair closer to the desk until it bumped with a harsh slap.

“No buts, Sasuke.” Itachi waved Sasuke away with his hand. “Go, get out of here before I send Kisame up to carry you out.”

“I'm already here, I might as well…”

“Go, now. Do something fun and mindless for once.” Itachi's finger crept closer to the intercom button, making his threat to call Kisame known.

“Whatever.” He didn't say anything else, just turned around and let the door shut hard on his way out. Maybe now, Itachi would bother getting the damn latch on the door fixed.

~*~

Sasuke pushed the closet door all the way open and dumped his laundry basket onto the floor, pushing a few stray socks that had scattered back towards the pile with his foot. He couldn't believe Itachi shooed him away from work. He called bullshit to no avail, arguing that he didn't need to take his birthday off. He'd rather work and ignore the nagging thought of being one year older.

Grumbling under his breath about what a bastard Itachi could be, Sasuke's foot pulled back, taking a white shirt with it. That's when he spotted it—ugly bright brown and green camouflage boxers, which obviously didn't belong to him. He looked down at his own boxers, black, or as Naruto sometimes referred to them: black like his soul. He had some other colors, but they were all dark and one solid color. He liked his clothes to look simple—even his underwear—not some god-awful color that everyone would notice.

Sasuke picked up the lint cleaner and poked at the worn cotton. The boxers had a hole in them near the crotch and about the size of a quarter. God, what the hell had Naruto done to them to make a hole in the crotch like that? He remembered buying them for Naruto several months ago on their trip to London, caving after a few minutes of Naruto asking to borrow the money for them. He had never bothered to collect. Naruto would have paid him back at some point, but it seemed inconsequential to ask, and he didn't really mind buying Naruto a gift now and then.

But he couldn't figure out how his gift ended up in his laundry hamper. He pinched the boxers between his index finger and thumb, careful to use the bare minimum amount of skin contact as possible to touch them, lifted the boxers up, and held it away from his face. His nose wrinkled up in disgust; they smelled like sweat, Naruto's sweat. And he didn't want to touch something that rested against Naruto's dirty, unwashed ass (he knew how long Naruto could go without showering sometimes). The boxers probably had rested against Naruto's ass for a few days before finding their way here.

Sasuke dropped the boxers onto the dryer and flicked them across the smooth white surface, watching them fall off the side and into the crack between the dryer and the wall. Naruto could do his own damn laundry. He wasn't the goddamn maid after all. Certainly not Naruto's maid. And he never liked those boxers anyway. Naruto wouldn't even know they turned up missing.

He closed the lid to the washer and backed out of the small closet space, satisfied that he adequately disposed of Naruto's boxers.

His cell phone rang so he closed the lid to the washer, reached around behind him, and picked it up. Good, Naruto's number showed up on the screen. He quickly put the phone up to his ear. “It's about goddamn time you called me back. I only called you three times this past week.”

“Hey, Sasuke, sorry, been busy.” The brief pause on the other end annoyed Sasuke—he didn't have any patience for hesitation today. “I can't stay on long, just callin to ask what your plans are this weekend.”

“It takes less than a minute to text me a message saying you're busy and will get back to me later.” Sasuke took a deep breath, trying to restrain his irritation. “And I don't have any plans, you know that.”

“Yeah, but…” He could hear Naruto sigh as if giving up. “Okay, well, just wonderin is all. Thought maybe you'd want to hang out with the gang or something.”

“Don't be an idiot. And they're your gang, not ours. Why would I want to hang out with them. They're loud and annoying.” Sasuke didn't like the sound of Naruto's suggestion; it reeked of a surprise party.

The weekend or his birthday weren't important to him. There were more pressing matters on his mind like why Naruto's things were randomly showing up in his apartment.

“God, why are you so anti-social? Your parents are nice… they hugged you enough when you were a kid! I know they did! I was there!”

Sasuke ignored Naruto's question, getting straight to the point. “Naruto, why do I keep finding your shit here? I thought we agreed when you stayed, you take it back home with you.”

Naruto often crashed on his couch, and Sasuke knew if he didn't lay down some rules, he'd end up with Naruto's shit, which tended to be bright and obnoxious, all over the place. And would most likely end up in all three of the hampers he had set aside for laundry—like the boxers—regardless of their color. So the rule started, and they both agreed on it.

“Hey, um, yeah… hey, you know what, you're starting to break up Sasuke. Sorry, drivin close to a tunnel and I need to go, so I'll talk to you later.” Before Sasuke could even demand that Naruto answer his question, he heard a dial tone.

“Shit, dammit, Naruto.” He closed his phone and slammed it down, mumbling under his breath while he headed towards the kitchen to clean. If his cell hadn't been a smart phone, it would have been smeared against the wall. He'd get Naruto back for leaving shit in his apartment. The little bastard could only stay hidden for so long.

~*~

“Satan called this morning, said he wants his soul back.” Sasuke sipped his Earl Grey tea, staring down Itachi. He at least managed to get Itachi to keep their usual lunch appointment instead of canceling. “Something about needing it this weekend so he can get laid.”

“Tell Satan he can have his soul back once I see his report on my desk.” Itachi stabbed his filet mignon before taking a bite. “Oh, by the way, your boyfriend called me earlier today, something about tonight and what your plans are. He seemed pretty damn stressed about it… things not going well in the bedroom?”

Sasuke closed his eyes and took a deep breath, trying to convince himself he wouldn't let Itachi bait him. And all because one time, back in their senior year of college, he and Naruto ended up making out behind a gazebo at a party. To be fair, they were both so drunk and high, they probably would have made out with a tree stump if no one else had been around. They had done a few things in college that Sasuke knew neither of them would probably do now. Of course, he had no intentions of relaying any of their few drunken times spent groping each other to Itachi.

It was bad enough that Itachi had caught the two of them with their hands down each other's pants. Just one time, and ever since, Naruto became `the boyfriend.' If Itachi knew about the other incidents, Sasuke would never hear the end of it. They were never to be spoken of again under any circumstances in Itachi's presence.

“Naruto [i]is not[/i] my boyfriend.” Sasuke set his fork down and glared at his brother. “No matter how much you insist on it, it won't make it true.”

“And Deidara can hardly count as Satan either, too mindless.” Itachi picked up his napkin and dabbed at his mouth. “More like a minion who likes to blow shit up.”

“Yeah, well, you're not the one who got an exploding clay dildo at last years Employee Christmas exchange.” Sasuke felt there was something tragic and ironic about having a fake dick explode in his hands. Luckily, he had decided against bringing Naruto to the party that night or he would be forced to hear endless dick jokes all night until he decided to choke his best friend.

“See, now, if he was Satan, and not just a minion, he would have bought a remote-controlled vibrating dildo and sent Karin the controller,” Itachi nonchalantly pointed out. “That would make him worthy of the title Satan… or at the very least, head minion.”

Sasuke hated to admit that Itachi had a valid point. Deidara was small-time when it came to pranks, or at least he had nothing on Naruto. And the thought of Karin having that kind of power disturbed him, especially since Itachi had just pointed it out. Did that mean Itachi had thought about it before? A shiver ran down his spine… all the more reason to make himself scarce for the rest of the day.

Sasuke couldn't believe his train of thoughts even headed in that direction. Maybe he did need a break from work. He doubted Itachi would actually do something like that. His brother enjoyed teasing and mind-fucking more than anything but to actually follow through, that was another story. Then again, Itachi had given him a swirly or two when they were kids. Sometimes he still had nightmares of being dunked in the toilet bowl while Itachi flushed.

“I hope you're not getting any ideas for next year's Christmas party.” Sasuke casually sipped his tea. “Because, I'd hate to phone mother and tell her that her eldest child is dead because you're a bastard.”

“The thought never crossed my mind.” Itachi's lips tilted up into a small smirk that told otherwise. “And besides, I wouldn't want to have to phone mother and tell her youngest child is in the psyche ward for being molested by a psychotic bitch.”

“She wouldn't believe you anyway. Not after catching you tormenting me a few times when we were kids.” Sasuke fiddled with his fork a little, “So what did Naruto say to you anyway?”

“Nothing much, just wanted to know what your plans were and if there was mention of a party tonight. The usual.”

Sasuke grunted. The usual indeed. “He didn't happen to mention leaving his toothbrush over at my place did he?”

“Toothbrush? No, he didn't say anything about that.” Itachi leaned a bit closer as if Sasuke had just said something very interesting instead of casually mentioning a toothbrush. “Why, did he leave one at your house this morning?”

“I never said anything about this morning.” Sasuke pulled back away from the table, suddenly feeling like Itachi was invading his personal space. “Do you know something I don't know?”

“Sasuke, you should know why Naruto is leaving his things at your apartment.” Itachi full out grinned, automatically making Sasuke suspicious that his brother knew something he didn't know. “He's only staying at Sakura's temporary isn't he?”

Sasuke didn't know how Itachi always seemed to be able to read him so well, but sure, he could take a good guess at what Naruto was doing. Yeah, Naruto was staying at Sakura's and probably not for an indefinite period of time. The two got along well enough but leave them alone for too long and the catty bitching would start soon enough, and he'd be stuck in the middle hearing about how Naruto was too loud or that Sakura took too long in the bathroom. Still he didn't care for where the conversation was headed.

“I think I'm done with lunch.” Sasuke pushed his plate away from him and pulled a couple twenties out of his pocket. “Here, this should cover my meal and a nice tip.”

“Where are you going?”

“Itachi you of all people should know, I'm going to go home, turn my phone to vibrate, and ignore the world.”

He stood up, pushing in his chair, and ignored the inquisitive look on Itachi's face. Sasuke knew what that look meant, and he didn't feel like dealing with. Sure Itachi had only been messing with him but thinking about Naruto and what Itachi had suggested killed his sense of humor or what little was left of it. Maybe going home and relaxing for a bit was a good idea.

~*~

Sasuke waited for Naruto to pick up and answer his phone call. He knew Naruto had decided that avoiding him would make the problem go away. Naruto should know better; problems never went away, only got worse with avoidance. And really it was odd for Naruto to act so sneaky about it. Normally, he would just directly come right out and confront problems.

Sasuke sort of understood the situation, though. At least he thought he did, but he still didn't like it. It did make him wonder what was going on with Sakura. He knew how those two got along well until left together in an enclosed space. When Naruto had first told Sasuke he was going to stay with Sakura, Sasuke had warned it might not be the best idea. Sakura liked to have dates come around a lot, and she liked her own space.

But Naruto had insisted it would be fine so Sasuke didn't feel any pity on his behalf. He always believed in dealing with consequences to his decisions so why should other people get a free pass? Why should Naruto be any different? The same rules should apply to him as everyone else. And if some of those consequences ended up being a punch in the face for his trouble, then that was okay in Sasuke's book.

He looked down at the huge pillow in his right hand and squeezed tighter, his fingers digging into the soft material. Sasuke realized that by touching it, he'd probably need another dose of meds but didn't care. The fucking thing had been lying across his head when he woke up. He had just laid down for a nap and now, and hour later, he woke up to his eyes sore and itchy.

The pillow just had to be filled with down feathers, which caused his allergies to completely crazy. He knew he had mentioned to Naruto before about his allergy to it. How hard could it be to keep something like that straight? They had known each other for years, long enough that Naruto had no real excuse for forgetting. Sasuke hated it when Naruto humored him about important things like that. Thinking back on it now, Naruto's eyes had taken on a slightly glazed look when he mentioned his allergies.

And how Naruto managed to sneak in his apartment without waking him up puzzled Sasuke.

“Come on, dumbass, answer the damn phone…” Sasuke waited another minute before closing his phone and giving up.

He'd keep calling Naruto until he got an answer. Or until he got fed up and planted his foot up Naruto's ass, whichever came first. He'd probably find his foot up Naruto's ass first considering how getting a hold of the asshole seemed impossible. The only thing left would be to find Naruto and make sure he couldn't fun away, and if his foot accidently slipped, then it slipped. And he'd go home satisfied that Naruto felt his wrath for making his face blow up first thing from his nap.

Sasuke tossed the pillow into a box and closed the lid. All of Naruto's shit needed to be returned and today seemed like a good day to do it. There were reasons why he spent most of his time at work—being alone for too long only made him think and overanalyze everything. Maybe he needed to take action instead of thinking about it.

Sasuke kicked the pillow across the floor, hoping that it would spontaneously combust and save him the trouble of picking it up again. At least he managed to take his allergy meds and get his symptoms under control. His face no longer looked puffy and red, and the itching in his eyes was starting to go away.

Something had to be done about Naruto's things taking up residence in his home. He didn't know what quite yet, but he had some ideas, starting with returning everything today. He just needed to find something big enough to put it all in so he didn't have to make more than one trip, and the pillow looked like it would take up enough room by itself. The thought of throwing it all in the dumpster behind the apartment building had crossed his mind, but then Naruto would probably do something equally irritating just to get him back.

Stalking towards his bedroom closet, certain he had a few boxes on the top shelf. Sasuke rummaged through and found a medium-sized one. That's all he needed to do, load Naruto's crap into box and drop it off at Sakura's.

Sasuke pulled down the box, closed the closet door, and began his hunt. It would work well enough, and anything that didn't fit, he would just make it fit. Even if he had to chop some of it up into tiny pieces (or set it on fire), one way or another, Naruto's crap would fit into the box.

~*~

Sasuke knocked for the fourth time on Sakura's door, glancing around the small front stoop. Sakura had a typical house, painted white with green shudders, small picket fence out front, and she even had some Hyacinths planted on each end of the steps right before the white railings that led to the door.

Naruto would be at work by now, but Sasuke felt certain that Sakura didn't work on Fridays. Or she at least worked a later shift, which worked out perfectly for him since the plan involved avoiding Naruto (and any drama that might occur from returning a box of Naruto's things). Last time Naruto whined about something to him, it felt like he had been donkey-kicked by the drama llama… if something like that were even possible. And Itachi had sent him home to enjoy his birthday; he refused to let anything else soil his mood.

Sasuke waited patiently, or at least patiently for him (for another minute or two), moving his foot back and forth against the concrete, scowled when Sakura still hadn't made an appearance. Kicked the edge of the door, he thought about all the better things he could be doing, like sitting at home, playing his PS3, ignoring the world, or maybe jerking off instead of dropping off Naruto's shit.

“Oh for fucks sakes, answer the damn door,” he muttered under his breath. How could he possibly relax at all today when he had to wait for everyone to get anything done?

First, Itachi had forced him to take the day off, and now he had to deal with people and their bullshit, specially, Naruto's evasive plans to slowly take over his apartment. And Sasuke would have none of that. They were both too old for childish games and had known each other for too long to bother with them. The only games Sasuke liked, other than regular games, were bedroom games, and he doubted Naruto would suddenly spring something like that on him, though the prospect of it intrigued him.

Sasuke reached out to knock again when he heard some rustling and a muffled man's voice before he heard Sakura yell out, “coming.” Suddenly, Sasuke felt uncomfortable; he hadn't counted on Sakura having company in the afternoon. The man obviously wasn't Naruto. Maybe he should just leave the box on the porch and quietly slip away before Sakura noticed him. Or before he embarrassed both of them with some awkward talk where he pretended to not notice she had a man over while handing her the box.

He didn't get the chance to quietly leave without notice. A second later, Sakura slowly opened the door, making sure that only her head was visible. Sasuke noticed part of a blanket hanging down.

“Oh, hey, Sasuke, what's up?” She pulled the blanket closer to her body.

Sasuke lifted the box up from the stoop. “I have a box of Naruto's things I want to return.”

“Oh, well, Naruto's not here, sorry. Maybe try back later.” Sakura shut the door before he had the chance to say anything.

Yeah, she definitely had a man over for a booty call, and was rude as hell for slamming the door in his face. Maybe that was why Naruto had stopped by a couple times this week. Sasuke could almost understand the reasoning behind it. Almost, but it didn't make him actually feel sorry for Naruto. Any feeling of empathy had passed when he woke up with a huge freaking allergy, stuffed between a cotton pillowcase, on his face earlier. Naruto would have no sympathy from him no matter how much fucking Sakura was doing.

In fact, maybe he would work something out with Sakura later to make sure Naruto got to hear her have sex extra, though he doubted she would go along with it. It would be so much easier if she were a guy. None of his male friends would have a problem doing that whatsoever, but he couldn't think of one woman he knew who'd go along with it. So that basically left that idea out. Why did Sakura have to be so… modest?

Sasuke looked down at the box in his hands. He could bring it back to his apartment, or he could just leave it there and hope that Naruto will trip on it when he gets home. Sasuke let the box drop out of his hands and headed back to his car. It wasn't his problem anymore.

~*~

Sasuke sat quietly in his living room, feet stretched out across the ottoman while he channel surfed. Nothing seemed to catch his attention, though and he soon tossed the remote aside. The fact that Itachi was right irked him and probably wouldn't hear the end of it now, though part of him felt amused by Naruto's antics. It might have been easier to just ask. But Naruto didn't operate that way, not when it came to something like this; the prick could be evasive as fuck with avoidance skills that rivaled Itachi's.

Only Itachi avoided answering his questions because he was an asshole and enjoyed tormenting him. Naruto did it more out of fear of losing something between them. One thing that Naruto hated, and Sasuke knew it, was rejection, and when it came to their friendship, he seemed particularly sensitive. It was like once Naruto attached himself to someone, he would do anything and everything to keep the friendship alive, even if it meant pulling some passive-aggressive bullshit regardless if it was even necessary.

He had to admit that it felt satisfying leaving Naruto's box outside as even though it seemed slightly immature on his part. It still felt good, though he knew it Naruto probably wouldn't learn from it. Maybe it would rain and get all of Naruto's belongings wet—that would teach Naruto to leave his shit lying around his apartment instead of just asking him for a favor. It didn't matter that he probably would have said no because he couldn't just agree to allow Naruto to move in with him. He would have made Naruto work for it if given the chance.

He would have gotten something out of the deal or negotiated ground laws, favors, anything to make Naruto squirm and to make his life more tolerable. Maybe he did need to go out and have a drink for his birthday if he had nothing better to do than think about ways to torment Naruto. Besides, Naruto obviously didn't plan on showing up anytime soon or at all even though it was his birthday.

He stood and stretched, pulling his arms over his head and bending sideways and down. Getting out of the house actually sounded appealing to him and it wasn't like he had anything better to do here. Sitting around and thinking about Naruto and revenge was beginning to bore and annoy him. And, even though he didn't want to admit to it, some disappointment also lurked in there—he had been certain Naruto would show up with their friends and force him into some kind of birthday party. He didn't know how he felt about Naruto suddenly being considerate and respecting his wishes.

Sasuke grabbed his coat and headed out. One drink and then he'd come back and figure out what to do about Naruto hope his apartment wasn't completely filled with Naruto's shit by then. He wouldn't put it past Naruto to be here when he got back and maybe it was best that he wasn't here when that happened or maybe he just felt overly paranoid and would come back to a quiet and empty apartment.

One drink at the bar or maybe five, or better yet, he could just stop at the small liquor store down the street and pick up a couple bottles of wine. That sounded far better than sitting in a hot overcrowded bar and trying to ignore the people around him even though he'd probably have to deal with Kakashi and his bullshit. But at least he could just ignore Kakashi and not have to worry about getting into a fight with some drunk idiot who couldn't take the hint that he didn't want to socialize.

Sasuke locked the door behind him, bypassed the elevator, and headed to the stairway. He always liked taking the stairs better rather than wait for the elevator to come up to the fourth floor. Quickly made his way down, he pushed open the door to the lobby and went out the front door.

The air felt chilly outside and a sliver of moon cast a dim glow on the concrete. Sasuke pulled his coat tight around him and buttoned up. It was the end of July but felt more like October. The summer had been mild and rainy so far and would probably stay that way. He hated the cold and wished it would warm up at least a little. The daytime wasn't too bad, but at night, he normally stayed inside on nights like this.

Sasuke did find walking to be refreshing despite the chilly air, especially whenever he needed a break from stress, usually work-related stress. Or in this case, Naruto related problems. He rounded the corner and saw the lit-up sign to the liquor store: Kakashi's Wine and Spirits.

Sasuke opened the door, ignoring the annoying jingle and “yo” that Kakashi said in greeting every time he came here. He never understood why Kakashi just couldn't invest in a better security system instead of relying on something so archaic and obnoxious. Just like Kakashi. It seemed fitting enough to him.

He headed towards the back where Kakashi kept the good wines stashed, passing the bottles of liquors, mixers, and whiskey. Sasuke pulled two bottles of Argentine Malbec off the shelf and inspected the labels. Not the best wine, but he didn't want to make the drive down to the winery, and it didn't taste too bad.

“Planning on another night to yourself?” Kakashi looked at him from over the top of the Enquirer.

Sasuke pulled out his credit card and swiped it, ignoring Kakashi. He didn't find it necessary to answer someone who always poked his nose into his business while reading a gossip magazine. Naruto would probably tell him he was judging Kakashi's taste in literature unfairly, but Sasuke didn't care. Kakashi's taste in literature from what he had seen over the years was complete garbage, especially the gay romance novels Kakashi had lying around. He had even snooped a few times and couldn't get past the first few pages of the horrible writing that seemed to plague the romance industry.

“Nice talking to you, stop by again.” Kakashi's eyes crinkled up from behind the magazine, and Sasuke had the sudden urge to punch the sarcasm off his face.

Instead, he just walked out of the store towards his apartment. Kakashi should be used to having one-sided conversations with him; they happened often enough, and he didn't really care if he offended Kakashi. He considered it payback for all the dumb things that came out of that man's mouth.

~*~

Sasuke opened the door to his apartment, quietly shutting it behind him. He slipped off his shoes on the mat when the sound of gunfire from his TV caught his attention. He glanced up and that's when he saw it… boxes, several of them, stacked neatly against the wall, and Naruto sitting on his couch playing Modern Warfare Three. He'd recognize that game anywhere.

He almost raised his voice to catch Naruto's attention, but stopped. Instead, Sasuke leaned against the wall, watching Naruto's blond spiky hair bob up and down, not quite knowing why he chose to watch for a few moments rather than demand some answers. Maybe because at this point it wouldn't do any good, and he couldn't see booting Naruto out this time of night. He could be a bastard sometimes, but even he wasn't that heartless—at least not to his friends and family.

In fact, bringing anything up right now seemed pointless. And maybe Naruto wasn't so stupid after all; maybe that was the big plan the whole time. Or maybe he shouldn't lose his anger or irritation so quickly at just the sight of his best friend. It was hard to stay mad at Naruto for any length of time, especially now that he had his walk and felt better. It didn't help that Naruto looked attractive sitting on the couch, clad only in boxers, with a serious look of concentration on his face.

He moved passed a few boxes, not saying anything to Naruto. If they needed to discuss anything, they could do it later. Right now, Sasuke just wanted to relax, have some wine, and enjoy the rest of his birthday. Maybe pick on Naruto about whether or not he had a present waiting for him. He really hoped his birthday present wasn't Naruto as his new roommate; he'd definitely call bullshit on that one. After the day he had, he wanted an actually present that didn't consist of people hiding in his closet, waiting for the right moment to pop out and yell happy birthday.

Sasuke set the bag of wine down on the coffee table and went to the kitchen to grab a wine glass. He eased onto the couch, propping his feet up on the ottoman. They settled into a pleasant silence while he watched Naruto try to shoot as many people as possible.

“So, you want to tell me what you've been doing all day?” Sasuke poured himself a glass of wine, not offering Naruto any.

“Hey, Sasuke, wanna play survival mode?” Naruto set down the game controller and grabbed some cheesy puffs, flashing him a smile. For a brief moment, their eyes met and some odd understanding seemed to pass over Sasuke, almost like a silent agreement not to push for answers.

“Right, that's how it's going be then.” He snatched the bag away from Naruto. “Those are mine by the way. If you want some, you'll have to buy your own.”

“Aww, c'mon, don't be a stingy asshole.” Naruto tried to swipe the bag away from him, but Sasuke pulled his hand just out of reach. Their shoulders touched, and Naruto's shirt rode up a little, giving Sasuke a view of his toned stomach.

“You know the deal, Naruto. If you want to live with me, you have to pay your way.” Sasuke leaned back into couch, settling in for the night, sipping some of his wine. “You can always go back to Sakura's. I'm sure her and her new boy toy will be happy to see you.”

“Tch, whatever, dickhead.” Naruto huffed, turning back to the game and muttered. “Like I want to hear her and her new boyfriend all night long.”

Sasuke smirked, stuffing a few cheesy puffs into his mouth, savoring the flavor of victory. Maybe having a roommate wouldn't be so bad. It would provide much amusement and take away some of his daily boredom, give him a chance to unleash his revenge on each slight Itachi threw his way. Yeah, he definitely could get used to tormenting Naruto everyday, just like old times.

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