Chapter 1: Off in a Daze
Off in a daze
Staring into a dream
Mind wanders erratically
And then bursts at the seems
All the while
In eyes so placid
The nerves are numbed
Emotions are flaccid
When the pain moves in
My body shuts down
Can’t think of anything
Blank stare and a frown
Try to remember what happened
What hurt me so bad?
My mind buries it so quickly
I wish I knew why I was sad
I try so hard to remember
Reminiscence is like last nights dream
The answer is ever fleeting
Hard to be certain, just can’t deem
I scrolled through the emails
Went off into a trance
The drug kicked in
I hadn’t a chance
I think so hard about what I see
But a thought doesn’t occur
I look so hard at the screen
But all I saw was a blur
I look like a hypocrite
I must be indeed
But I can’t stand the lies
Stifled as I read
I simply can’t speak
Can’t think at that
I dial your number
The line goes flat
I’m saying to you everything I think
But only in my mind
I open my mouth to speak
My tongue is in a bind
Maybe it’s just the shock
Maybe it’s just me
Or maybe it’s my heart trapping
My hurt in lock and key
So much love
It scares me so
Do I love you that purely?
Or are my sights that low
It’s so hard to express
When you cannot grasp
So hard to tell
In a shallow gasp
My head is growing heavy
Eyes going dim
I’m so fucking tired
So tired of him
But nothing can ever be easy
Not for Heather, it can't
I shake my head solemnly
Rest in peace I shan't
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