The Nature of Pride: Chapter 1

The Nature of Pride



This is written in Vegeta point of view. It's just an introspective reflexion. Shounen-ai.

Disclaimer:I don't own dragonball/DBZ/DBGT. They belong to
Akira Toriyama, TOEI and FUNimation.

"THE NATURE OF PRIDE"

Pride. I've always relied on my pride. It's been the source of my
strength, my support against the horrors I had to endured under
Freeza, the bloody bastard. I had to hide behind a mask of arrogance and
coldness to survive all the humiliations I've been put through.

So I used to think that the nature of my pride was courage and
strength. Maybe that was true then, my pride was the only thing that kept
me to be broken, that kept me sane through all the insanity that
surrounded me.

The lizard raised me to be a heartless murderer. I've been taught to feel
nothing, no remorse, no compassion; for the world is a terrible place where
only the strongest ones rule over everything and everyone. And the weak
ones only deserve to suffer and die.

But now, this pride is useless, is nothing but an obstacle to my
happiness. This pride, which has nurtured my obsession to surpass
Kakarot, is just a chain that enslave me to a past that I deeply abhor.

There's no more Freeza, no tyrant who threats my dignity, noone to try to
destroy my soul. Certainly,there's someone stronger than me...but he's
different from everybody else. He could kill you with a simple
punch...but still, he choses to show mercy. He shows you affection, he
makes you feel that he cares for you; he cherishes life and worships
every living creature. And yet, he's completely free, nobody can defeat him
or rule him, nobody can submitt his spirit or break his will. And that's
his real strength.

So when I hide behind the mask of my usual arrogance to insult him and
accuse him to be a disgrace for the saiyajin race, I realize that the
nature of my pride, actually, is no more strength and courage, but
cowardice and fear.

Yes, I, Vegeta, prince of the saiyans, finally can admitt to myself that
I'm just a fucking coward; because I'm afraid. Afraid to open myself, to
reveal my true feelings. Afraid of closeness with the one I longing
for. Afraid that he can see through my soul what I've always considered a
weakness...But, why should I be afraid, I know he never would mock me or
laugh at me, he would never used it against me, I even have the hope that
he wouldn't reject me.

I'm afraid to admitt that you are magnificent, Kakarot, for having
accomplished what no other saiyan could.

You're the pride of our race. You are my true pride,Kakarot. And maybe, one
day I will be strong enough to admit that ,before you. And that day I
will be proud of myself,too. Cause that day I will be free for the first
time in my life. Free to begin a new life, free to find happiness. And I'll
make sure that you will be my side, Kakarot.

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