I Will Love You Forever: Paean

I hereby declare that I claim no rights to NARUTO © 1999 by Kishimoto Masashi/SHUEISHA Inc. and recieve no monetary benefit for any narrative I publish hereafter based on this manga or any of its other media adaptations.

Warnings are in place for manga spoilers

-Xtase

This is dedicated to Itachi's second passing in chapter 591. It is basically a sum-up of his life told from his perspective. There is also an epilogue narrated by Sasuke. This was very emotional for me to write; and I burst into tears on a few occasions. It is inspired by his seemingly boundless love for his brother and is tenderly devoted to his memory. He was one of my favourite NARUTO characters, and I even though we probably won't see him ever again, I will never forget him.

By the way, I strongly suggest listening to NAROTO SHIPPUUDEN OST Track 27 - Nakama while you read this. On repeat. Trust me.

You were far too young to remember that first turning point in my life. The night our parents were gone and I was left to care for you. The night Kyuubi ripped our village apart.

The wailing screams and deafening roars in the distance had frightened you, as well as I. What was going to happen to this shivering bundle in my arms? What could I do to keep you safe? And then you began to cry so helplessly. What could I do to comfort you?

Feeling you shrink into my chest, looking down at your tiny face, I finally found an answer. I would do whatever it took to keep you from harm And that was the moment I first realised that I would give my life to protect you. Because it was my purpose as your older brother. Because it was my duty not to fail you. Because I loved you.

And after that night I trained as hard as I could. Not only to become a first-class shinobi. Not only to prove I was worthy to succeed father as head of the proud Uchiha clan. It was also for your sake, so I would not fail you in your hour of need. And that was my mistake.

As I grew stronger and more confident of my abilities, I began to underestimate you. I constantly shielded you from the reality of the corrupt shinobi world. And since I was irrevocably bound to that world I only succeded in pushing you away from the real me.

I grew proud, Sasuke. As long as I was here, you would not need to know the truth, you would not need to prepare yourself. What Sasuke doesn't know won't hurt him. What a fool I was, thinking I was so wise when I knew nothing. Nothing!

And so I began to take you for granted. I did not know, just how little time we had left together. I knew things were escalating. The tenuous thread between the clan and the village was wearing thin. The threat of coflict had become so tangible that when I came to know of my final ANBU mission, I was not surprised. I had been expecting it, dreading it. Yet when it came I still did not know what to do, how I was to go about making that terrible decision. Suddenly the right to protect your existence had been taken out of my hands. If I accepted, I would have to assassinate you, if I refused you would be eliminated by Konoha. I did not know what to do. Then Danzo promised me your safety if I sided with Konoha. In the end I chose the village, and your life, over my clan.

The last days I spent in the village were the most beautiful and painful of my existence. I was severely torn. If I was nice to you during our last days together as comrades it would only make the crime I was about to commit hurt you even more.

Avoiding you would have been the best option, if only to desensitize you the by even the slightest bit. But I had been selfish. I could not stay away, I could not pass up the chance to make you happy one last time. And that only made your ordeal even crueller to bear. I did not want the happy days to come to an end. But a lone shinobi's wishes are pointless in the face of maintaining peace.

Leaving you behind was the single most difficult thing I had ever done. For a moment my legs simply refused to move. Looking back at your unconcious body, I felt a chill run through me. You looked too similar to the corpses littered around you.

I was always amazed at my ability to keep calm when looking at your hate-filled gaze. Even though it never failed to cause a searing pain in my chest and a violent twist in my gut. Every time I had to mentally torture you, every time I dished out another brutal beating, I felt like screaming my throat raw.

I wanted to soothe you with kind words. But my lips did not move, the vocal cords did not engage, and the arms that longed to hold you crippled you instead. And when I finally could speak all that came out was a stream of taunting filth. As I observed my reflection in your eyes I felt my own prickle with tears. But instead of letting them fall, my eyes began to bleed red as my Mangekyou manifested itself. I didn't even know which part of my mind had dreamed up those dreadful torture methods. Maybe a small part of me had truly become the heartless criminal I am presumed to be. The only comfort I got was the knowledge that no matter how badly I hurt you, I was the one who felt the most pain.

During our last confrontation I was affected by many feelings. I was so happy to see you nearly all grown up. I was proud of the immense cunning and strength you had acquired, and my only wish was that I had been with you all these years. I wished I could have watched you grow into the man you were that day. I wished I could have lived to see the man you would become in the future. I wished that I could continue to be your brother.

But I had long decided that if by dying I could atone for my sins against you, and give you some relief at last, then I could not ask for more. And as the darkness began to claim me, I felt relieved that I had accomplished what I had set out to do. But my peace didn't last for long.

I was shocked and disappointed when Naruto-kun informed me of your decision. And I never expected our paths to cross again. When I heard you imply that you would rather have died as a child I felt my stomach drop. Yes, that would have been better for you, but I stubbornly refused to give up on my desire to keep you alive and your current predicament is a result of my selfishness. I thought I had done the right thing, but I had been sadly mistaken.

And now you have ironically fulfilled your childhood desire to follow in my footsteps. Now you are a disgraced shinobi, a dangerous criminal with your reputation in tatters and a bounty on your head. Just like your big brother.

I failed you time and again, I realise now that I cannot save you on my own. Nothing I say will ever convince you to turn away from destroying Konoha. That is why only Naruto-kun and your friends can save you. I clearly cannot do so on my own.

But it is so good to be with you again. Never in my wildest dreams did I ever imagine I would have the honour of fighting at your side. I felt I was going to weep when we stood shoulder to shoulder, allies at last. I was so unbearably happy.

Deep in my heart, a small part of me was grateful to Kabuto for giving me this last chance to be with you. Even now I am selfish, thanking this man for utilising a technique that has already caused the deaths of so many people.

And now as my conciousness begins to fade away I make my final turning point. I will not shield you from reality, I will no longer insult your abilities by decieving you with my illusions. I will not try to protect you again. In this moment, I will face you as my equal, the way I should have from the very start.

You do not need me to protect you. Your rapid growth attests to that; you have manifested the Mangekyou's abilites to such a great extent in such a short space of time. You have achieved the goal I set for you all those years ago and exceeded my expectations. I am no longer the obstacle you must overcome, in fact you are on the cusp of surpassing me. This fills me with joy, Sasuke, my heart is brimming with happiness. And this makes me realise that I was so preoccupied with trying to save you that I forgot what was really important. You have come this far without me, and you will go even further when I'm gone. So in this moment I will face you head on, as a man, and tell you what I really think.

Since the day you were born you have been the light of my life; no one can ever compare to you. No one is more important to me. No one frustrates me, gets under my skin, and drives me crazy the way you do. And despite your ill intentions regarding Konoha, I am so proud of you, Sasuke.

I am glad that you are. I am glad that your face is the last sight I will see on this earth. I am glad that I am lucky enough to die in your presence for a second time. I am glad that despite my flaws and shortcomings you still insist that you love me. I am glad that we could truly be brothers once again.

I have made my choice, and my choice is to love you completely, unconditionally, whatever happens. I choose to accept you, I choose to believe in you. I thank you deeply, from the bottom of my heart and soul, for not being like me and staying true to who you are. And I choose not to stand in your way, to let you travel your own path. And I pray with all my heart that you somehow find happiness at the end of your journey. And I hope I can be with you in the next life, Sasuke. Because you are worth it. Because I love you. And I will never stop.

"No matter what you decide to do from now on... I will love you forever.