Amazon Madness: Chapter 8: The Journey to China

Miyuki: Chapter Eight is on its way!

Dante: Right. And where is this story going again?

Miyuki: I’m not going to tell you. You’ll just have to wait and see.

Dante: Tell me!

Miyuki: No, I won’t.

Dante: Tell me, I say! (keeps pestering Miyuki)

Chapter Eight: The Journey To China

“So, Ranma, any thoughts of how we’re going to get there?” Akane asked, following Ranko, Shampoo, and Ryoga out the gates and down the street.

“Actually, yes. I’m going to bribe the old ghoul into putting us on a plane,” she said.

“Great-grandma will take us,” Shampoo said confidently.

“Uh-huh. And how are you going to bribe her?” Akane asked.

“Why Akane, you need to have more faith in Ranko!” Ryoga said, wagging his finger at Akane.

“Faith? I Ranma? You’re joking, right?” she asked, raising one eyebrow incredulously.

“Why would I joke about that? Has she ever steered you wrong before?” Ryoga began walking next to Ranko, his arm slung over her shoulder.

“Well, actually . . .”

“Hush, Akane!” Ranko said, clapping her hand over Akane’s mouth to prevent her from saying anything further.

Ranko rolled her eyes and pushed open the door to the Nekohanten.

“Well, Son-In-Law, back again? You come here more than we do,” Cologne said.

“Oh stuff it,” Ranko muttered.

“Ranma! Is that any way to speak to someone who is going to take us to China?” Akane demanded, hitting her on the back of the head.

“Take you to China? Why do you want me to take you to China?” Cologne asked.

“Uh, so I can find a cure for this lipstick of course!” Ranko snapped. “What, are you going senile now, too?”

“No you idiot. I know why you want to go, I mean why me?”

“Because Pop is too cheap to give us tickets for a plane, and I really don’t want to walk all the way to China again,” she explained.

“So now I’m stuck being your chauffeur? What’s in it for me?”

“They happiness of being able to witness the lifting of my curse.”

Cologne raised one eyebrow.

Ranko sighed. “Fine. I’ll try to stop calling you names.” The eyebrow stayed up. “And I’ll give you my allowance for the next three months.”

“Hmm. Money and respect in exchange for four plane tickets to China. Okay, I guess that’ll work,” she said, nodding.

“Yes! Thank you! If I weren’t still angry over the lipstick I’d hug you!” Ranko squealed.

“That’s all right. I’m not sure I want you to hug me anyway.”

“And if I wasn’t completely excited about you taking us to China, I’d take offense to that.”

Two days later, Akane, Shampoo, Ryoga, Ranko, and Cologne stood just inside the Tokyo International Airport.

“We finally going home!” Shampoo cheered, waving one of her bon-bori around in the air.

“Uh, Shampoo, you might want to put that away before they call security,” Ranko muttered out of the corner of her mouth.

“Why? I no hurting anyone,” Shampoo said, shrugging.

“Never mind,” Ranko said. There was just no reasoning with that girl sometimes. Once she made up her mind about something, you’d be hard-pressed to make her change her mind.

Above them, the loudspeakers crackled into life. “All passengers on Flight 147 to China, please make your way to the third terminal now, please. All passengers on Flight 147 to China, please make your way to the third terminal now.”

“That’s us,” Akane said. “Man, I’m nervous. I’ve never flown on a plane before.”

“You, nervous? Ha, that’s a good one!’ Ranko said, clapping Akane on her shoulder.

“Why do you sound like it’s impossible for me to be afraid?” she demanded.

“Because it’s . . . well, it’s you!”

“Yeah. And?” She put her hands on her hips challengingly.

“And . . . You can’t be scared. You faced down the entire male division of the school, from jocks to geeks without blinking. You faced Kodachi for crying out loud, and now you’re scared of a plane? You’re pathetic!”

“Pathetic? I’m pathetic? Who was it that fell under the influence of that lipstick? Who was it that then slipped on a towel and kissed Ryoga? Who was it that went to China as a martial artist, and came back as a cross dresser?” As she ranted, her voice rose in pitch until she almost couldn’t be heard.

“Shhh! Akane! People are staring!” Ranko said, her voice taking on a note of panic.

“And they should! Let them see the most brainless idiot in the world!” she shrieked.

“Uh, guys, we’re going to miss our plane if we don’t hurry,” Ryoga said, trying to break up the dueling pair.

“You know Ryoga, that may be the most sensible thing you’ve ever said,” Ranko told him, spinning around and stalking off in the direction of the third terminal.

“Why thank you, my love!” Ryoga said, trotting off after her happily.

“Go away! I’m not sitting with you!” she snapped, hurrying away.

“But why?” he asked, hurt. “don’t you like me?”

“No, I don’t! That’s the whole point of going to China, you dunce!”

While they argued, they had made it through the terminal and onto the plane.

“So, where do we sit?” Akane asked, back to being her usual sunny self now that Ranko had backed off. Ranko had a sneaking suspicion that Akane also liked seeing her tormented by Ryoga.

“I want window seat!” Shampoo called, bounding forward and plopping herself down a few rows away.

“I think I’ll sit behind her,” Ranko said. “That way I can keep an eye on her.”

“I’ll sit-” Ryoga began.

“Next to Akane, so she can keep an eye on you,” Ranko finished firmly.

“Why does he have to sit with me? Why can’t you watch him?” Akane demanded indignantly.

“Because Cologne is sitting next to me, so there’s no room!” Ranko shot back. “No one’s sitting next to you.”

Akane sighed and nodded. “Fine. But he’s sitting with you on the way back,” she said, crossing her arms.

“Whatever,” Ranko said, settling down in the seat.

In a few minutes, the flight attendant came through, explaining everything and showing the safety film. A little after that, the plane roared into life and began moving.

Akane sat in her seat, gripping the arm rests so hard her knuckles turned white.

“Hey Akane, you okay?” Ranko called, noticing her death-grip on the seat.

“Don’t talk to me right now,” she hissed, not turning around.

“Akane no have fun?” Shampoo asked across the aisle.

“I’ll have fun later, right now I want this to be over,” she said.

The aisle tipped level as the plane rose into the air and evened out.

“That’s better,” Akane said, releasing the seat.

“Well, now that we’ve took off, I’m going to sleep. Wake me when we get to China,” Ranko said, scooting down in the seat and closing her eyes. “This may be the last chance I get to sleep for a while,” she muttered, as sleep overwhelmed her.