Loyalty is...: Chapter 10

        Myranda smiled at him when she saw Anubis.

        Anubis smiled back as he whispered. “He's asleep you know.”

        “I know. I don't mind.” Myranda whispered back.

        Anubis chuckled and shook his head in disbelief. “Boy, have you ever got it bad.”

        “I sure do.” She replied proudly.

        “Then I'll leave you two alone. Goodnight.”

        “Goodnight Anubis.”

        Anubis walked off and went back inside through the back door. Shuten awoke as soon as he heard the door shut then groaned from being in the same position for so long.

        “Have a nice nap sleepyhead?” Myranda teased.

        “Sorry about that minx. What time is it?”

        “I say it's close to midnight.”

        “Midnight? Why didn't you wake me?”

        “You were obviously exhausted Shuten. I didn't mind. I was just happy to be with you.”

        Shuten smiled down at her as he stroked her hair. “Did you see any more falling stars?”

        “Oh yes. I lost count after fifty but I did keep on wishing.”

        He squeezed her hand before speaking. “We should get ourselves to bed. It's getting late and you look a little exhausted yourself.”

        “I am exhausted. I've just been fighting it.”

        Shuten helped her out of the hammock before getting up himself. He didn't let go of her hand as they walked into the house and up the stairs.

        When they got to Myranda's door Myranda bid Shuten goodnight as she fought the urge to drag him inside with her.

        She was about to enter her room when Shuten called her name.

        “Yes?” She asked as she turned back to face him.

        “Will we be attempting to finish the newspaper's crossword puzzle tomorrow?”

        She sensed his feelings and realized that he was trying to prolong their time together and it touched her deeply. “Of course, it's our Sunday morning ritual.”

        Shuten nodded but continued to stand there looking down at her.

        “Was there something else you wanted to say?” She asked quietly.  

        When he said nothing she asked. “Did you want to come in?”

        That broke whatever trance he was in. “As much as I would like to say yes, we both know what could transpire.”

        “Is that such a bad thing?” She asked her voice a mere whisper.

        “No.” He replied just as softly as he cupped her face. “I imagine it would actually be quite beautiful.”

        “Maybe some day we'll get the chance to find out.”

        Shuten had no reply. He pulled her into a tight embrace. “It's late minx. Get some rest so we can tackle that puzzle in the morning.”

        “All right Shuten. You do the same.”

        “I will. Goodnight Myranda.” Shuten let her go but would not meet her eyes.

        Myranda felt the anguish running through him and as much as she wanted to comfort him she feared that she would only make matters worse for him.

        “Goodnight Shuten.” Myranda turned, stepped into her room and slowly shut the door.

        Shuten fought the urge to go into Myranda's room and climb into bed next to her for several moments before giving up and going downstairs.

        He walked into the study and noticed Mia's computer was on. He figured that she either forgot to turn it off or was downloading a large file. He stood with his back to the desk looking out the French doors that led to the balcony. It was a familiar and comfortable spot for him. He spent many an hour there when he had taken on the roll of the ancient after leaving Talpa and the Dynasty.

        He looked out onto the lake. The ripples on the water obscuring the reflection of the star filled sky. Right now he felt as distorted as the reflection he was looking at.

        What was he going to do? Why did he tell Myranda that things would not work out between them, then allow himself to kiss her and urge her not to give up? There was no denying that she wanted to be with him. She had not hidden that fact from him. And as fragile as he knew her heart was she trusted him with it which meant the world to Shuten.

        When she went into her room tonight it felt like he was never going to see her again. If he was this miserable now how was he going to feel when she left to go back to New York? Why couldn't he just ask her to stay?

        He knew the answer. His dammed honor and fear of Myranda hating him for it kept him from asking her. Yet he couldn't stand the thought of not being with her.

        Shuten closed his eyes and imagined how wonderful it would feel to be curled up behind her in her bed right now. That one night they spent together was one of the best nights of sleep he had in years. Never had he felt so at peace.

        Shuten was so lost in his thoughts that he didn't hear Mia enter the room or know she was there until she walked up behind him and spoke.

        “What are you doing up so late?”

        Shuten was startled but didn't show it. His stance remained ramrod straight like the soldier he once was.

        He avoided answering by asking a question of his own. “I could ask the same of you Mia.”

        Shuten did not turn around when he asked his question, nor did he meet her eyes in the reflection of the window.

        “I'm finding that being with child does strange things to the mind and body. I woke up and felt wide awake and knowing that I wasn't going to get back to sleep right away I decided to come down here and do some research. What is your excuse?”

        Shuten sighed inwardly. He should have known he wasn't going to get out of answering. “Just contemplating.” He said quietly.

        Mia had a pretty good idea that Shuten needed to talk but as usual, he was apprehensive about opening up. She decided to tempt fate and asked out of the blue. “Is it just me or does Myranda not seem to be her usual self?”

        Mia didn't think it was possible but Shuten's stance grew even stiffer.

“What do you mean?” He asked quietly.

“Well she used to do the same thing in college. On the outside she was very cheery but I always knew when something was bothering her. She's very good at hiding her feelings and only a handful of people can usually tell when she's doing that. I just thought you might have noticed.”

Shuten bowed his head and closed his eyes. “It's my fault.”

“Your fault? I find that hard to believe Shuten. You could never do anything wrong in her eyes.”

“One may think that, however I did her a great injustice.”

“I hardly call a hickey an injustice.” Mia said.

Shuten snorted. “If it were only that trivial.”

“Will you tell me what happened Shuten?” She asked gently knowing how hard it was for him to talk about his personal life.

“I'm a fool Mia. The first two days Myranda was here I was trying to avoid her.”

“I figured that out when you didn't even hug her on your way to work the first day. What I don't know is why?”

“I thought the less time I spent with her my feelings for her would fade. I knew that was going to fail as soon as she stepped out of the car that morning. I stayed out late that night hoping she would have gone to bed but there she was on the porch swing. She claimed she couldn't sleep but I knew she was waiting up for me. The next night I came home late again. I thought everyone had gone to bed until I heard a guitar being played. She was out there,” he gestured with his head. “on the balcony singing. After she chastised me for spying on her we sat and talked for a while. She had told me things about her past that she never had before. One thing led to another and I kissed her. I ended up staying with her that night. I didn't want her to be alone. I led her to believe that she and I could have a chance together then last night I broke it off when I realized that we couldn't be together when we live so far apart. I fooled myself and her. I did the one thing I didn't want to. I broke her heart.”

“How long have you felt this way about her Shuten?”

“Longer than I care to admit Mia.”

“Do you love her Shuten?”

Shuten was not yet ready to admit he loved Myranda though in his heart he knew he did. “I care for Myranda very much.”

“I've never said anything to anyone about this, but when she realized your soul was trapped in the jewel of life, I had never seen her have such a reaction before. It even scared Avery where the happening took so much out of her. Then when you two met for the first time you both clicked with one another. That's when I knew the two of you were soul mates.”

“How can that be with all the obstacles that are between us?”

“Some of these obstacles could be easily overcome Shuten. Where there's a will there is a way. That's actually what I was doing down here.”

“I don't understand.” Shuten said confused.

“I wasn't going to say anything because I didn't want to get anyone's hopes up. I'm going through grandfather's files to see if I can find something that can help you and Myranda. I was going to ask Kayura if she could also contact the ancient for some answers if that's all right with you.”

“Mia, why are you doing this?”

“Because you and Myranda are two of my closest friends, you've both had such troublesome pasts, it's time that both of you found peace and happiness.”

Shuten was rendered speechless. “Mia…I don't know what to say.”

“How about `thank you and sorry for keeping you away from your husband.' I think that would cover it at this time of night.” Rajura said from the doorway as he yawned.

Mia turned to Rajura. “I came down all by myself. Shuten didn't even know I was down here.”

“It is late though.” Shuten said. “Make your husband happy and go upstairs with him.”

“All right. Please don't tell Myranda what I'm trying to do.”

“I won't. Goodnight.” Shuten headed for the doorway.

Rajura smiled at him. “If there's anything that can be done, she will find it.”

“I know.” Shuten said smiling back.

Shuten continued upstairs to his room when Rajura heard his bedroom door close he walked over to Mia as she shut down the computer. “So desperate to play matchmaker that you couldn't sleep?” He teased.

“I've been napping all day. Is it any wonder that I'm wide awake now?”

“Come to bed and I'll tire you out.” He purred into her ear.

“Will you let me try and do some research tomorrow?”

“If it will get you to come back to bed then yes.”

“Then it's a deal. I could use some tiring out.”

When Shuten got to his room he changed into pajama bottoms and a T-shirt then sat at the edge of his bed. At least now he had a little glimmer of hope, something more tangible then wishing on falling stars. He looked at the wall that separated his room from Myranda's and thought about how alone she might be feeling. The more he thought about it the more he wanted to be with her.

Shuten stood and left his room he stood in front of Myranda's door and knocked lightly. When there was no answer he paused before opening the door. He stepped in and closed the door behind him.

Myranda was sound asleep on the left side of the bed. He walked over and slid into bed behind her. He placed his arm across her waist and curled up behind her.

Myranda was half asleep but knew she was no longer alone when she tried to move, Shuten shushed her. “Go back to sleep minx. Pretend your dreaming.”

“Shuten…why…” She mumbled.

He shushed her again. “Please minx for me. Pretend I'm just a dream and go back to sleep.”

“Only if you let me turn around.” She whispered.

Shuten rolled onto his back and Myranda turned to rest her head on his chest then placed her arm on his chest and swung her leg over the both of his. “I like to control my dreams and in this one I won't be letting go.” She mumbled.

Shuten reached out and held the hand that she had on his chest. He smiled down at her before closing his eyes and falling asleep.